Have you and your partner ever fought about texting?
Most people have.
Here are the most common conflicts:
Non-responsiveness. You’ve texted and your partner isn’t getting back to you. What is he doing? He commented on Instagram, so you know he’s on his phone. Is he just ignoring you on purpose? He always has his phone with him. Why isn’t he responding? Maybe he’s punishing you. Or maybe he doesn’t care about what you asked. Doesn’t he ever think about you during the day? How can he be so thoughtless?
Tone. Your wife sent you a message: “when are you coming home?” You two have a history of arguing over you working “too late” and not keeping her in the loop. You know what she means here. She’s annoyed. She’s mad because you didn’t let her know when you’d be home and now the conflict has begun.
Going to war. This can happen in a few different ways. It can be the outcome of the non-responsive scenario or the tone scenario. You react to your partner (via text) based on the assumptions described above:
“You never answer me! I saw you on Instagram… don’t pretend like you didn’t get my text.”
“Oh, you’re mad already. That’s great. Excuse me for trying to get my work done. Maybe I’ll stay later, since you’re going to be in a bad mood anyway.
It can also happen by bringing up a conflict discussion in text. Initiating a conversation that’s likely to be emotionally charged and that you don’t expect to see eye-to-eye on via text is likely start to an all out war.
Any of this sound familiar?
In this week’s episode we’re filling you in on the landmines to avoid, the struggles we’ve had around texting with our significant others, and how to make texting work for your relationship.